Odi et amo. quare id faciam fortasse requiris?
‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎nescio sed fieri sentio et excrucior.

I hate and love. Perhaps you're asking why I do that?
‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎I don't know, but I feel it happening, and am racked.
back

07/09/26: i'm a cold, hard, bitch. i can do hard things. Knight of Wands

05/09/26: 4th visit to the doctor in a month. Cure me or kill me. Ace of Pentacles (Reversed)

04/09/26: This frail-child-cold that crusts my eyes over. Will I survive winter? The Hierophant (Reversed)

31/08/26: Sick with fever, clutching on to your arm and listening to ambient. Embarrassing. King of Wands

30/08/26: My first love's birthday. The Draughtsman's Contract (1982) while hungover. Everything is spiralling out of reach. Strength (Reversed)

29/08/26: Dance, dance, dance. Was so dizzy listening to you and your friends when we could've been alone, together. Nine of Cups

28/08/26: The kindess of friends cannot go underappreciated. Some friends will drive and drive for you. Thank you, S for the afternoon. Kitten licks in the evening, like real literal baby cats. Judgement

27/08/26: Bursting out of my cocoon of sickness. I will miss you Tim Curry and Dolly Parton. I met a girl and spent a lot of time thinking about how I want her to fuck me in her apartment on a rainy afternoon. The Sun (Reversed)

20/08/26: I was built in a lab to be sick. Predestined to have a raw, itchy, fucked-out throat, to sleep for ages. Ten of Swords (Reversed)

19/08/26: Just because my hand's around your throat doesn't mean I don't love you. The Hierophant (Reversed)

18/08/26: Fussy. Love is an anchor that grounds me to the soil of university. Thought about surviving an apocalypse with my mother. The Moon (Reversed)

17/08/26: My eyes hurt. Reading and a stye. Met the boy at the clinic that I had dreamt of sucking off; his dick tasted like the beer he had bought me at franz ferdinand 9 months ago. Our little pale ale baby? Page of Wands

16/08/26: Edward Said is in everything I learn and read about. Post-colonialism is so important. B said we are in a 'The Tower' moment in our life, and what do you know? The Tower

15/08/26: Chose a more metafictional approach over a swift one. Goth Craft Night at the Flying V with B. A glass of IPA covered in glue. Ace of Swords

14/08/26: "Just tolerate my little fist tugging on your forest chest... I don't wanna talk about anything." The Hierophant

13/08/26: Stop haunting my dreams. Why the fuck are you on my old queen sized bed with soft hands and a warm neck? I should kill you. The Moon (Reversed)

12/08/26: Gold isn't everything. The blistering heat of the sun where I sweat you out, shimmers more. Makes me shimmer more. Queen of Pentacles

11/08/26: I had a dream that he slapped me and I liked it. Different guy. This year, I am retreating further back into my mind. Five of Pentacles (Reversed)

Go on, tempt fate.



A piece of me, a small sacrifice: